Like Coco Chanel, I love luxury! My heart does palpitations when I walk by the boutiques in Paris. A three-star Michelin restaurant evokes moans and groans. And, a fabulous handbag and a hotel staff that is constantly saying “my pleasure” at my every request makes my heart melt. The original post appeared here.

I even developed a Society where I have the honor of mentoring a passionate group of women while we travel to some of the most luxurious places in the world, such as Aspen, Paris and Monaco. I  believe it’s important that women learn how to infuse their businesses, lives and souls with luxury. (By the way, that pic is of us at our slumber party with a private chef at the Ritz.)

 

Call me vain, materialistic or whatever word you have for people like me. I really don’t care. In fact, I understand. I use to feel the same about people living “the good life,” and you know what? It wasn’t because I thought they were bad people. It was all my stuff.  Deep down, I was just jealous, because I wanted it too.

Here’s what you should know about me. I haven’t always lived such a luxurious lifestyle. In fact, I’ve been flat broke. I’m talking eating Ramen noodles, living in a double-wide, chasing down the K-mart blue light special and putting 25 cents worth of gas in my car broke.

 

I’m also not a money coach, meaning I don’t teach you how to make more money. Instead, I teach you how to tap into your desires, learn how to turn your work into play, create an inner glow that will blind a room, follow your passions and live life full out. Money just seems to follow such a lady.

What I’ve discovered is that you must first learn how to think like a luxurious person to attract a luxurious life, which is what “French Kissing Life” is all about – filling each day with joie de vivre, style and elegance – all of which can be achieved with little money in the bank. In fact, this method, not some money management system, is exactly how I attracted a most luxurious life.

I want to show you how to do the same, because I know deep down, you’d probably enjoy a nice bottle of wine or a night at the Ritz Carlton. And, darling, that is beautiful! There is nothing at all wrong with desiring the finer things in life.  In fact, I’m cheering you on!

MAKE LUXURY ATTAINABLE.

Very few people are fortunate enough to become overnight millionaires, but if you want to live a luxurious life, you must align your energy with luxury. So, what is a lady to do?

Well, you may need to redefine luxury to make it obtainable now, because if your current definition is fine yachts and you drive a Pinto, guess what? You’re screwed.

 

So, let’s think of luxury as this: quality people, experiences and things.

When I decided many years ago that I was fed up with the crap in my life, I started seeking quality. I was done with the junk foods, whining people and plastics made in China. I wanted more for myself, but I couldn’t afford Chanel at the time (and although I write about her like we’re best friends now, I still don’t own a piece.)

APPRECIATE LUXURY.

If you’re reading this, it tells me that you most likely have a computer. That’s a luxury. Show some gratitude for all that you do have. There is luxury all around you darling – the sun, sky, moon, stars, a kiss. Wake up and just notice.

LUXURY IS ABOUT QUALITY, AND SOMETIMES THE MOST QUALITY EXPERIENCES ARE FREE.

I can’t think of anything more luxurious than hanging out with my daughter on the sofa watching a really good movie or my morning cup of coffee on my back deck.Instead of me giving you some woo-woo law of attraction guide on energy alignment to attract more money, I am going to share my real-life examples of how I began to experience luxury long before my first Ritz-Carlton stay (BTW, j’adore the Ritz.  The staff is just precious). When I started doing the following things, the world of luxury opened its big arms and embraced me:

• I stopped hanging out with complaining people who were always talking about how broke they were. Major luxury repellent.
• I sought out quality relationships with people who were no strangers to luxury. I wanted to learn how to think like them.
• I spent more time in nature. There’s nothing as luxurious as walking barefoot in the grass on a summer evening or a good hike in the woods.
• Luxury abhors haste, so I slowed down and enjoyed cups of coffees and conversations with friends.
• I stopped spending my money on crap. This is for all my ladies who love to go to T.J. Maxx and stock up. For me, the “2 for $20″ deals no longer felt like such a great bargain. I was stuffing my life with less than I deserved. I began to save those $20s here and there to buy what I really wanted. This approach was also how I was able to invest in my first mastermind, which helped to call more abundance into my life. Luxury is not about quantity; it’s the quality that matters.
• I hung out in the lobbies of fine hotels and just experienced the world of luxury. They don’t charge you for lobby space, and they usually have free wi-fi. Great office space, by the way.
• I drove a junk car so I could splurge on good food. My life did not suffered one bit from the occasional rattle, but that homemade truffle infused ravioli with a touch of creme fraiche? I’m still about it.
• I followed my passion and attended sommelier school. The $500 initial investment opened me up to a whole different level of luxury where I was able to taste a $1000 bottle of wine and say something fancy like, “Hhhmm….I think it needs to breath for a while.” Major luxury moment. (By the way, by following my desire to learn more about the world of wine, I was asked to write restaurant reviews for a regional magazine and create wine programs in our town, which led to more luxurious experiences that paid me. How cool is that?)
• I dressed and walked like a woman of luxury, meaning I didn’t walk out of my house in baggy jeans and a T-shirt with my shoulders slumped. I always aim to look my very best before I leave my house. (Just a little pointer: have a couple of go-to outfits for different occasions that you can just grab and go and look fabulous).
• I became a student of luxury, reading quality literature, watching classic films and readingTown and Country and Vogue.
• I stopped listening to my thoughts that said things like, “Girl, you grew up in a trailer. Who do you think you are?” It’s just needless chatter. You get to write your story from here on out.
• I started fully engaging with my world and the people in it, asking questions, seeking answers and constantly putting myself out there. Scary? Yes! Thrilling?Absolument!
• I placed fresh flowers in my home. Flowers are nature’s Chanel.
• I visited my parents more. They always make me feel like a princess.
• I sought out quality conversations that discussed the fascinating stuff of life, like death, love, politics, religion, travel, fashion and food and wine. Well, at least those things are interesting to me. Your list may look completely different.
• I attended luxurious events, such as an orientation for women at Duke’s School of Business. Keep in mind, I was working as a full-time nurse and had never been in business. These events also didn’t cost me a dime other than the gas to get there. This is how you begin to call things to you, darling.
• I started walking through Saks as if I belonged there, not like some freak whose eyes were going to pop out of my sockets when I saw the price of a Louisbag. Nope, just a shoulder shrug like it wasn’t the bag for me.
• I became a major food snob and committed to moving my body daily. I would save up and go to the nicest restaurants. Fois gras? I’ll take it. A glass of Sauterne to wash it down? Of course! I also made moving my body a daily priority. Some days, it was a saunter; other days a full out sweat session. Just move.
• I cleaned (and continue to clean) my world of low-quality people, things and experiences.True luxury does not co-exist with chaos, drama and clutter.
• I believed I deserved a luxurious life. This is the most important of all. Many women are walking around feeling guilty if they invest $20 dollars in themselves. A $1000 handbag? Dear Lord. They heel over in a full blown panic attack before they could get out the door of Bergdorfs.If that’s you, listen to me. You are not doing yourself or the world of favor by denying yourself of a luxurious life. The most giving people I know live the good life, which is how they are able to help so many others. You’ve got to clean up this thought that you don’t deserve it in order to allow luxury into your life.
• I believed I deserved a luxurious life. The most giving people I know live the good life, which is how they are able to help so many others. You’ve got to clean up this thought that you don’t deserve it in order to allow luxury into your life.
• I started doing was blessing those who lived a luxurious lifestyle, instead of judging and secretly hating them. By saying, “You go girl” every time I saw a woman rocking out her Prada dress, walking out of the massage parlor or sashaying into the Four Seasons, I was opening my heart to the Universe and saying, “Bring it on. I’m ready!”
• To give is luxurious. When you give of your money, time and energy, it’s like opening up space to allow abundance and luxury to flow into your life.

I’ll leave you with this thought.  Luxury is yours to define.  It may have nothing to do with handbags, a cute bell boy or a pillow-top bed.  And, sometimes, it may be that deal at Tar-jay. However you define it, you can begin to allow more of it in your life when you come from a place of celebration, open to possibility and take one playful step at a time.